Does Absence Make the Heart Grow Fonder or Wander?
Every time you are in a new relationship, all you want to do is spend your free time with your partner. In fact, you would make time out of your busy schedule just so that they feel extra attentive. That’s what new love does to you. All kinds of relationships need that extra care and at the same time it’s very important to provide each other with their own space in the relationship. No couple wants to stick together all day long without doing anything productive. Well, such plans sound amazing to execute once in a while but ending up at your lovers door every second day just because you wanted to hang? You should not be looking for such kind of relationship. [ Read: 5 Beautiful and Romantic Love Quotes for Your Partner from the Heart ]
Every relationship has its own rules and every couple has the right to set their relationship with rules and functions that work for them. Getting too clingy spoils the relationship and makes it very monotonous. Giving too much space also does not do any good for the couple.
Below are few pros and cons of being physically and mentally absent in a relationship and the effects it has on you and on the relationship.
Haven’t seen them for a while? Can’t wait to see that face and shower it with infinite kisses? Yes that’s how excited one gets when they haven’t seen their partner for a while and that’s one of the biggest pros of having to spend some time away from your lover. You are already missing them so much that you keep counting minutes to the time you actually get to see them in person. All the time away has actually made you feel how much you love them and you can’t think of a future without them. [ Read: 10 Exciting Ways To Find Missed Connection ]
Too much missing:
Who likes to spend their nights crying by missing someone so bad? Nobody does, it happens when your partner is not with you for a very long time. Staying away from each other will not always work in your favor. It actually brings negativity to your relationship. One thing someone never wants in his/her relationship is to create so much space in between themselves and their partner that eventually spoils the bond between their hearts and gradually destroys the relationship.
How long can you talk over phone and express those feelings? Doesn’t it start to feel unnatural? If two people are together they spontaneously connect in every way possible. Physical intimacy is as important as emotional connectivity. There are different ways to express love and the most expressive way out of all the forms is real and genuine intimacy. These feeling are not made up and you are instantly so attracted towards your partner that you want to show them with your actions, and when the physical absence due to work or others reasons start to fill in the relationship, couples tend to drift away and the bond between them dies a little every time they can’t have them by their side, when they miss them and actually need each other the most. [ Read: Common Problems Faced by Couples Who Live Together ]
It’s been long that you both haven’t seen each other, and exchanging calls has also decreased massively. You keep thinking about each other but work life and other major and minor things have taken the front seat to the extent that you have unintentionally set each other as your last priority. Lack of communication due to any reason definitely makes the heart wander and gets you restless. You have no idea what to do and where to start. You know you love them and your relationship needs effort, but the ignorance and absence has forced you both to push each other away for no reason.
You see your partner after a very long time, you are obviously excited, but when you see them, do you start to feel a little uncomfortable and start feeling there is some kind of wall between you two which is not letting you both feel connected? If yes, your relationship has certainly reached that phase where the absence has done its damage. Do you try to mend things and make up for all the time you couldn’t give to the relationship, but to no avail? This is because not being with each other for a long time and not being able to see each other’s face has created a gap which cannot be fulfilled any longer. [ Read: Invisible Signs You Will Break Up in a Few Months ]
It’s too hard right? Too hard to go through this? You know that you love this person but can’t express it anymore which makes you extremely frustrated. You know you are over and done but your hearts tell you to try harder. Your heart and brain start to fight against each other. All this makes you mad. You know they are yours but you don’t have them completely. This also affects your heath and will raise the level of stress in your life.
Falling out of love:
Somewhere down the line you also know that it’s all over but your heart and all the memories you have with your partner force you to stick around and would not let you go that easily. The absence has created a deep pit between you both and you both are practically aware that it can’t be filled. All this stress makes you fall out of love with your partner. You still care for them but because you know whatever you have with them can’t work out well. You should start taking mature decisions and decide to move on in life, force yourself into burying the past by starting a fresh life. [ Read: Reasons Why Relationships are Such Hard Work and Need Focus ]
Excess of anything is not good. This rule should be applied everywhere. Yes, giving space to your partner is a very mature thing to do but spacing out so much that they feel left out would not make your relationship very healthy with them. Everyone has the right to design their relationship according to their needs and wishes but some things should always be taken care of. Loving your partner and providing them all the time they need and deserve only proves what a wonderful partner you are and how lucky your lover is to have you in their life.