12 Clear Signs You Have Big Commitment Issues!
Commitment phobia. Does this ring a bell? How about commitment issues? If you have been wondering why none of your relationships last and develop into something more than just dating, chances are you could be having commitment issues. The worst thing about having commitment issues is that many times people who have them don’t even realize so! If you are in double minds and cannot figure whether or not you are a commitment phobic subconsciously, let me make it easy for you.
Here are a few tell-tale signs of a commitment phoebe. Go through them and ask the questions to yourself. If you find yourself answering in affirmative to most of them, then you know what it means!
- You guard your independence like it’s the last breath of fresh air
If the words privacy, me time, peace, independence are your idea of relationship rules, it means that you have difficulties adjusting to life with a partner. When in a relationship, life is not simply about yourself. You are a team and need to live like one. If you see relationship as a threat to your independence, then dude, you have commitment issues! [ Read: 7 Reasons Why Guys Can Be Commitment Phobic
- You are attracted to people who are easily distracted
People in general are constantly on a look-out for potential partners, that’s basic human nature. We seek out partners that match our thought wavelength and appeal to our tastes, Most importantly, we need partners with whom we can see the potential of a lasting relationship. If you are attracted to people who are not much focused and are free birds, it means that you are not on a lookout for people you want in your life for long. [ Read: Simple Expectations of A Girlfriend From Her Boyfriend ]
- None of your relationships go past the honeymoon period
The honeymoon period. That wonderful time when you look at the world with rose tinted glasses and the world is all cupcakes and candy floss. The time when romance is at its peak and you both cannot get enough of each other. What happens after that? Whether a relationship holds water or not is decided once the honeymoon period is over. Do you stay or run away? [ Read: 7 Best Ways To Deepen His Love For You ]
- You judge people in relationships
Are you of the opinion that your friends in relationships are losing out on life? Do you feel that relationships limit how much you can enjoy in life? You, my friend, are judging people in relationships. And that only goes to say that you do not agree with the idea of being in a relationship.
- You aren’t very open to people
When you have very set standards of what your ideal partner should be like, you are closing your mind to exploring the amazing people that you could be with. We all have a rough idea of what qualities we would like in our partner, however, that does not mean that you have everything noted down, right from the color of their hair to the kind of clothes they would wear. This increases your chances of remaining single.
- You are selective about who you hang out with
I know, we tend to get comfortable with some people easily. That’s how friendships are formed. However, if you are very selective with the kind of people you hang out with, won’t that limit your chances of meeting new people, and a possible future partner. However, if you make this choice knowing this well, you are running from commitment, my friend.
- You were cheated/ played with
Many times, commitment phobia stems from a deeper rooted problem. Many people who have been through a tough or bad relationship always have inhibitions of giving the same power to other people. So if you were in a relationship where you were cheated on or taken for granted, you are justified in having reservations against entering into a new relation.
- No strings attached
How amazing it is to not be responsible for another person. Life is complicated enough to take care if oneself, why complicate it further by involving others as well, right? This is the perfect reasoning a commitment phobic gives. If these lines are speaking the state of your mind, then yes, you have commitment issues.
- You are loud, and make people squirm away
If your behavior is loud enough to drive people away, there might be an underlying problem. Maybe, sub consciously, you do not want people to stay with you for longer period. If you are driving people away, that could only mean that you are running away from commitment.
- You joke about ‘monogamy’
A soul is big enough to love more than one. Who says one can have only one soulmate? We are here to spread love to as many people as we like. Single relationships do not fulfill the heart’s need for immense love – classic commitment phobia dialogues!
- Excuses, and excuses. You are all about excuses
When anybody asks you what went wrong with your last failed relationship, you have many excuses but no proper reason. Even when in a relationship, your partner asks you for your time and all you give them is excuses. If this is you, you have commitment issues written all over you.
- The chase is better than the deal
Just like the honeymoon period, you pursue a person simply because chasing is so much fun. It is more appealing to you than actually being in a relationship. You usually go after people who are hard to get and once you have impressed the other person, you lose all interest. Commitment issues couldn’t be described any better! [ Read: Learning Lessons And Applying Them To Your Relationships ]
Relationships may not be all rosy, but they are not all thorns either. Give it a chance and you will be glad that you did!