10 Questions You Need to ask Your Partner Before Seeking a Divorce
Before you file a divorce, it is important to analyse the reason behind you taking this step. Talk to your partner at length and discuss the issue with them. If there are some questions you would like to pose to them, now is the time to ask them those questions. Some people find it awkward to bring up the topic of divorce with their partner and directly file for the divorce without talking about it even once. If you want to a file for a divorce, go ahead with it but before you do so just have a heart to heart conversation with your partner. [ Read: Seeking a Divorce? Ask Yourself these 10 Questions
Here are 10 questions you need to ask your partner before seeking a divorce:
- Why are you not happy with me?
If you think your partner is not happy with you, you must ask the reason for the same. If they give you some valid reasons, you could work on yourself based on the feedback provided by them and perhaps, save your relationship in the process. A lot of people find it difficult to accept that they are not doing enough to keep their partner happy. Do not be egoistic and listen to your partner’s grievances about the same. [ Read: 5 Points to Keep in Mind When Dating a Divorcee ]
- Why did you get married to me?
There is a reason behind two people coming together and deciding to spend their entire life together. There is a force that gets them attracted to each other. You should take the help of your partner in looking for that factor which made you stick together for so long. Maybe that same reason or factor could help you rekindle your love and change your decision.
- Are you okay with it?
You must be completely honest with your partner and tell them as to what prompted you to take this step. Most people remain quiet about it and suddenly, slap a legal notice on their partner. Even if you wish to part ways with your partner, you should treat them with respect and make the process as civilized as possible. Let them know that you wish to seek a divorce. [ Read: You Meet Someone And You Fall In Love And That’s That ]
- Whom should the children go with?
This is something most couples fight about. Each of the parents fight over the right to take their children with them. They do not realize that, in the process, their children get hurt and deeply affected by this. This should be resolved peacefully between the couple. They should decide among themselves who should the children go with. They should keep the children’s interest in mind while deciding this.
- How do you plan to go about the finances?
The responsibility of a family is borne equally by the husband and the wife. The finances are managed by both of them and they share the weight of the financial burden together. However, they would not be sharing these responsibilities after they get a divorce. You must act sensible and ask your partner as to how do they plan to manage their finances in the future. There should be equal contribution coming from both of you in a few cases like children’s education, house loan etc. [ Read: 6 Delightful Quotes For The Man Of Your Life ]
- Shall we give each other some time?
There are certain things in life which you should not jump into without any thought. You should think about them carefully before deciding the course of action. Even when both of you have mutually decided to part ways, you could consider giving each other sometime before arriving upon a decision. Mull over it for a while and then, decide whether you really want this.
- Are you equipped to handle this?
You might have prepared yourself o deal with what is coming your way but you should also make sure that your partner is mentally ready to go through this. You should not be selfish and think about their state of mind as well. Break the news to them and ask them whether they are ready to deal with this situation as yet. [ Read: 10 Tips for Surviving Christmas if you are a Separated Parent ]
- What went wrong?
If you are seeking a divorce and want to part ways with your partner, there must be something that went wrong with your marriage. You have an idea of the things that did not work but you must also consult your partner and ask them to share their views on the same. There must be something that troubled as well.
- Do you have any questions?
You had your chance. Now you should give your partner the opportunity to put forward some questions to you as well. Some of their questions might end up hurting you or upset you, but you should lend a keen ear and respond to everything they say. You should be civilized in the manner you respond to them and at no point should things get ugly. [ Read: Reasons Why He Hasn’t Asked You to Marry Him Yet ]
- How do you plan to move forward?
You shared a lot of time together but the road ahead will be lonesome, at least for some time. Both of you should discuss as to how do you plan to lead your lies after the divorce. If possible offer your partner some advice o the way they should lead their life and provide them with all the support you can.
A divorce is a bitter experience and often the proceedings turn out to be ugly. You should act mature and try to make it a civilized affair. There is no point in playing a blame game or making things worse than they already are.